Did you ever listen to their stories? Again, I bet yes.
Did you ever understand what they actually feel? Some may yes, some may no.
Here, I'd like to tell you about some important things how to understand your friends' feelings.
First, when your friends tell you about their happiness, just be happy for them whether it's good or bad. You can explain your inconvenience later on after their smile go away from their face.
Second, this may be the hardest thing to not be done by most people. When your friends are sad, ask them why. If they do not answer it, all you can do is don't push them to tell you what they've been through. Just wait, and cheer them up as long as you can.
However, if they tell you what their problem is, listen carefully. Don't ask any question until they permit you to do so. When they're done, all you can do is say some curing words like "sabar ya", "kamu pasti kuat", "kita di sini buat kamu kok", "don't be sad too long, you're too precious to cry", etc. Do not offer any suggestion if they don't ask any. Just don't. Or even the worse, don't blame them right after you listen to their story, they may forget to tell you the detail-missing parts.
What if they ask your suggestion or advice?
Here some rules when you have to give any advice or suggestion:
1. Do not be a teacher. Do not preach your friends like you told your little sister to do something good.
2. Do not argue with your friends. Let them talk if they don't disagree with your opinion. In the end, its their life, not yours.
3. Do not compare your such experience to theirs. You may miss something they did not tell you.
4. Do not ask too much. Detail may be perfect to complete your suggestion, but when your friend won't tell you the little hidden part, don't give them any pressure to do it.
I personally admitted that I've done many mistakes like I didn't completely do my suggested "rules". But yes, my past shows what I've done wrong and so I can make it better.
Overall, my conclusion is that brokenhearted doesn't need advice, a long warm hug can be an instant cure of it. Cheers, fellas!
2. Do not argue with your friends. Let them talk if they don't disagree with your opinion. In the end, its their life, not yours.
3. Do not compare your such experience to theirs. You may miss something they did not tell you.
4. Do not ask too much. Detail may be perfect to complete your suggestion, but when your friend won't tell you the little hidden part, don't give them any pressure to do it.
I personally admitted that I've done many mistakes like I didn't completely do my suggested "rules". But yes, my past shows what I've done wrong and so I can make it better.
Overall, my conclusion is that brokenhearted doesn't need advice, a long warm hug can be an instant cure of it. Cheers, fellas!
